Due Date

When I first found out I was pregnant, I put a ticker on my iGoogle page that had a running countdown to my due date. It was helpful to keep track of which trimester I was in and how many days / weeks / months pregnant I was. After I got my diagnosis of gestational diabetes, I also used it to keep track of how many more days I would have to be on my diet.

Over the weekend, I looked at it and mentioned to Bryan that there were only 4 more days until my due date. He looked over at Gavin and laughed. "We better start getting ready," he said. I finally removed the ticker from my page.

Since I always expected to go full term (if not longer) it feels a little odd to have had Gavin so early. If it had been up to him, I'm sure the he would have arrived this week. Instead, he is almost three weeks old and starting to lose his newborness.

There is a part of me that feels like a failure because I had to be induced. My OB told me that a year from now, all the insanity that lead to Gavin's birth wouldn't matter. Personally, I think my OB is an ass. Of course it matters. It is part of the story of how Gavin was born.

But as time goes by, especially as this milestone goes by, it is becoming easier to accept. And even see that it is not the most important part of the story.